14 August 2009

me


me. standing, holding one of the dogs i look after. ive stayed at nine stone now for i think about a month. im tolerating it, is all i can say. im sure, improving my weight has helped me become stronger and more able to fight the condition. yet i havent been this weight for ten years. its not as bad as i thought it was going to be.
i just wish when we park up near the woods, i could go for a short walk. the smell of damp earth is so nice upon my nostrils. it feels odd that theres nothing wrong with my legs, just my internal system not working properly that is preventing me from walking. im hoping that with maybe a change of medication that that will alter the state that im in now, to an even better one.
i know i have much improved since may. when i was unable to get out of bed. or do anything for myself. sometimes pots does just pass with time.
hope you like the picture.

4 comments:

lotte said...

Dogs are supposed to be very theraputic for a number of reasons....I think i need at least 10

xx

alice said...

hi lotte

me too! its a big decision to make, or it is for me. i tend to overanalyse things, and talk myself out of them. i should listen to what i really think.

hope you start to feel a bit better soon. things do pass, and maybe a few years from now you will start to look back and realise what a crap place you were in. try and concentrate on your daughter, and maybe a hobby. xxxx

Nechtan said...

Hi Alice,

It is good to see you are looking so well. I hope the visits to the hospital to provide you with a way to go for these walks. Its depressive enough being stuck indoors but more so when you can see places you want to go but can't. That would be great if they could get to the root of this and enable you to go a-wandering. The main thing is you are taking those steps at the moment and in doing so giving yourself the best chance possible of getting out there in future.

All the best

Nechtan

alice said...

hi nechtan

i so hope that i will be well soon. i still have at the back of my wardrobe a pair of walking boots, well worn, and a brand new pair i got as a present a few years back. i loved to walk, espically in the countryside. i would walk miles, i suffered with anxiety then, not as much, but i noticed that all the feelings would disappear with each step. im looking forward to that again
thanks.x