24 March 2010

cant be bovvered

having a few of those days. im not depressed or down. just can be bovvered to do anything. got the appointment through for prof g, mid-april. my necks aching a bit. i suppose when you cant do very much at all most of the time, you might have a slump.

rosies on the mend. slowly putting weight back that she lost.

im just off out somewhere, no idea where.

and today i read a piece on pots. a panic less, panic attack. thats what i feel like at times. like there is nothing to panic about, yet i get the feelings of panic, at the most unfortunate of times.

oh what a post, a lot of nonsense.


diver said...

'... there is nothing to panic about, yet i get the feelings of panic.'

Gee Em, that's precisely what I feel when in the grip of a blood sugar crash. It's not 'panic' just a surge of adrenaline caused by my dubious body processes.

Maybe something similar happens to you from time to time ... something to do with the POTS or EDS ???

Anonymous said...

Hi Em,

When you've not got your freedom and are stuck indoors mostly I think days like these are inevitable. I have spells like this also. My own is more like an agitated state. Its when that need to get out, the cabin fever, and the fact I can't collide head on. I get very on edge and feel a trembling inside and there is no peace from it.

I hope the appointment goes well. Not too long to wait considering how slow they can be at times. With everything you have gone through with Rosie I wonder also if you've been fully occuppied with that and now your mind is returning back to introspection.

All the best


Rusty Hoe said...

My husband calls me 'Twitchy' on those days. I'm often exhausted but feel like I should move and if I don't the feeling just gets worse. My mind also gets twitchy, like little spurts of thoughts nothing coherent really nothing I can use and if I try to focus it just melts away from me and the feeling comes back. Some days you just have to accept it, ride it out and hope for better tomorrow. It's weird I used to work with dementia patients and they'd get this strange agitation, where they'd pick at things, move things around, touch lots of things with no rhyme or reason. Sometimes it'd last a few hours, sometimes a day. Sometimes I think I'm in that same place. It's like a voiceless nameless level of agitation/tension.

Em said...

hi diver

im sure achelois said there had been something to do with anxiety related to eds. certainly pots has to do with the autonomic nervous system so that makes sense.
thanks x


hi nechtan

i used to be an on the go person. doing something all the time, whether it be mentally or physically. so being inactive isnt an attractive option for me. although because ive had no choice ive kind of come to terms with this.

im sure rosie has taken up some of my thought space. although i think im not worrying i probably am. xx


hi michelle

at times i feel like im losing my mind. the small things that i do, stopping in the middle of conversations because i dont know whats going on, losing the thread of things. certainly with my writing i can just about string two words together and make loads of mistakes in the mean time. (bovvered isnt misspelt an english comedian says it!, well it is misspelt but you know what i mean).

itchy twitchy days, i think the body wants to do, yet the body is unable to do. oh how i long for a normal body. x